Target Stock's Nosedive: Rock Bottom or Just Getting Started?

[Generated Title]: Target's Stock Plunge: Is This the End, or Just Another Retail Apocalypse Episode?

Okay, let's get real. Target's stock [target stock price] is tanking. Down 35% this year, 67% since late 2021? That ain't a dip; it's a freakin' cliff dive. And now they're cutting their profit guidance? Color me shocked. Target cuts earnings guidance, warns about high prices, and predicts a weak holiday season - Yahoo Finance

The Numbers Don't Lie (But They Do Confuse)

So, Target's numbers are all over the place. Sales down, traffic down, but digital sales up? What gives? Are people too lazy to walk into a store now? Or are they just browsing online and then heading to Walmart [walmart stock] for the cheaper stuff? I'm betting it's the latter.

They're blaming it on "trade offs," saying people are buying more candy but less Halloween decor. Give me a break. That sounds like some corporate spin to deflect from the fact that people just don't have as much money to throw around anymore. Inflation is a bitch, and Target's "cheap chic" ain't so cheap anymore.

And get this: comparable sales decreased 2.7% year over year, but digital comparable sales increased 2.4%. So, the online store is doing okay. But is "okay" good enough when the brick-and-mortar stores are bleeding out?

Throwing Money at the Problem (and AI?)

Target's answer to all this? Spend more money. They're planning to pump $5 billion into remodeling stores next year. Because, you know, a fresh coat of paint is gonna solve the problem of people not wanting to buy your overpriced throw pillows.

But here's the kicker: they're partnering with OpenAI to let people shop on Target in ChatGPT. Seriously? So now I can ask a chatbot to buy me a new shower curtain? What is this, the future? I thought the future was supposed to be flying cars, not AI-powered retail therapy.

And they're using AI to figure out what's "trendy." They've got this "Target Trend Brain" thing. Listen, if you need an AI to tell you what's popular, you're already screwed. Trends are organic, they're about what people actually want, not what some algorithm thinks they should want. What if the AI starts pushing Crocs again? I shudder at the thought.

Oh, and they cut prices on 3,000 items. Okay, that's something, I guess. But is it enough? Are a few discounted cans of beans gonna bring back the customers who fled after the whole DEI debacle? I don't know.

The Blame Game

Speaking of that DEI mess... Target is blaming it for hurting sales. Well, duh. Alienating half your customer base is generally not a great business strategy. But let's be real, it's not just the DEI thing. It's a whole bunch of things piling up.

Neil Saunders, some analyst at GlobalData Retail, said Target is "really struggling and does not seem to be able to climb out of the hole it has dug itself into." Ouch. But, honestly, can you argue with that? I can't.

And Brian Cornell is stepping down as CEO. Convenient timing, huh? Right before the whole thing goes completely down the drain. Michael Fiddelke is taking over. Good luck with that, buddy. You're gonna need it.

So, What's the Real Story?

Target's in trouble. Big trouble. They're throwing money at the problem, they're dabbling in AI, they're blaming everyone but themselves. The stock [target stocks] is plummeting, and I don't see it turning around anytime soon. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they'll pull a rabbit out of their hat. But honestly, it feels like the retail apocalypse is just getting started, and Target's about to become another casualty.